“So what’s happening with your wedding?”

Bride-to-be stories…

The question I’m sure most brides-to-be are fed up of hearing! 

Postponing your wedding can be a heart-breaking process (trust me, I have had to do it twice so far!). Our original ‘would be wedding day’ was planned for May 2020 which we had decided to postpone to later in the year in October as soon as lockdown was announced. 

October came, and the number of people permitted was just simply not enough for us. We both have large immediate families with me being the youngest of 4 and my other half being the youngest of 5!

Going through this process myself, as well as having clients who have postponed or are thinking about postponing their special day, I thought I would share some advice and tips on what to consider when postponing your wedding.  

It’s okay to be upset

When I first decided to postpone, I felt I was almost being too superficial and selfish for being upset. I have always been quite a control freak, and struggled to delegate aspects of the wedding to my friends and family, (think Monica from Friends!) and suddenly when the pandemic hit everything was out of my control. 

I then had many ladies in my life telling me to just go ahead with an intimate wedding, mostly married ladies who funnily enough had already had their dream wedding! But just know that you are not being selfish, you have planned this day for a while, years maybe, so the frustration you will be feeling is okay. 

Speak to your suppliers, and keep that line of communication open with them, they are there to guide and help you. As cliché as it sounds, we are all in this together and working closer with your suppliers can help you put contingency plans in place. 

Time to postpone?

If you are going through the process, or thinking about postponing your special day here are a few things to consider: 

Maximum dates from your venue 

Obtain a few dates from your venue before enquiring with your other suppliers on whether they are available. Your venue is likely to be one of your biggest expenses for the day, and so it would be worthwhile to try and keep this the same and find the most suitable date for the majority of your suppliers. 

Prioritise your compromises

Which suppliers would you least like to compromise? Make a list of all of your suppliers in order of priority. Although your ideal situation would be all of your suppliers being available on the date you postpone to, it is a possibility that one or two may not be available. There may be aspects of your wedding that are super important to you and you do not want to compromise, so it’s important to know which suppliers you would like to avoid compromising. For example, for me, the Hindu priest and music provider I had booked were at the top of my list of priorities as they really set the tone and atmosphere during the day.

       Keep communicating with your suppliers

As I mentioned before, keeping the line of communication with your suppliers open is key. They will have experienced going through the same process with other couples so they are the best to turn to for some advice and guidance. Remember, you are not the only other couple going through this and it’s likely you’ll be able to brainstorm some great ideas with your suppliers to make the best out of your special day. 

        Be innovative

As micro-weddings are becoming the new norm, there are many aspects you can get creative with to make sure your day is still special. You may want to consider how you can make your wedding interactive for guests who may be watching on a live stream at home. Perhaps, you want to consider a wedding website where they can leave messages for your guestbook and have a live feed of photos so they can still be a part of your day. 

You are also going to have fewer mouths to feed and fewer expectations! This means more room in your budget to spend on making your event even more personal and intimate. Perhaps you spend more on the décor and make it more bespoke to you, representing you both as a couple. Alternatively, you may want to have a more elaborate menu for the close loved ones who are able to attend.  

Your day WILL be special regardless

At the end of it all, you just need to remember your decision is keeping your family and friends feeling comfortable and safe. As important as this milestone may be for you both to start your lives together, just remember you will have a lifetime to build memories and moments together which will all be cherished just as much. 

Blog by: Tulsi Hirani, The Paper Bohemian

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